Life thus Far: an overview

It's that time of year again guys!! My favourite season..although, saying that, we've had such a gorgeous summer in the UK this year, that I haven't wanted Autumn to begin if I'm honest. The year has also massively whizzed by and I find it completely bewildering that it's October- am I alone in that? It's been a whirlwind, right!?

Anyway, I reckoned that I haven't checked in with you all properly, and a lot has gone on, life wise [and plenty, not so much.] This post was actually going to be something quite different, but it's time for a lowdown...

Let's see....well, it's Autumn: the cosy, snuggly season, and I'm laughing to myself because, yes people, I'm still single. Now, don't think I'm like, overly upset about this. Just stating a fact. I've been “single” for a lonnng time now and it’s got me intrigued looking at relationships around me.. Do I miss a significant other, do I crave it, do I worry about finding “it”. Honestly; at times. (which is what dating is for) Then I look deeper at couples and can see the cracks and the neediness. Not everyone, but some. I like that I don’t need someone..I don’t need to depend on that someone. I see lots of people jump from 1 person to the next. Plain silly. It would be lovely to find a fella but I had the real deal once & it flawed me and now, I’ll only turn for the next real deal..
​
mental health *trigger warning* As mentioned above, I wanted to write a different post today- it was going to be related around CBT and how you can intertwine it yourself using self-care. Work-wise, life hasn't been kind to me this year. I feel like I've had inner struggles these last couple of months, whereby my thoughts turned negative and racing. My thought processes were all off.. my mind has definitely been focusing on if's, but's & cant's. I'm pretty much certain I've had a trade off of anxiety issues following my brain surgery in '04 and I've been vocal in my difficulties in the last few years, but I've managed to cope with self perseverance but lately I've felt, I don't know, inadequate. Unconfident in my abilities, comparing oneself and wondering if I'll hit the milestones I crave, or whether I'm just unworthy of life. As previously written, one of my dearest friend's committed suicide 5 years ago..I miss him every day & when a negative thought emerges, the universe makes me think of him & the great things I have achieved and to come. Keep your thoughts positive, because they manifest instantly into form, whatever the feeling; Focus only upon your desires and not upon your fears.

topsy-turvey life issues Over the past few weeks, my family's life have gone off quilter slightly. One of my older brother's was very sadly and fearfully, put into an induced coma. I don't wish to go into details and the reasons why and so forth, as it's unfair. It's been a struggle though for the whole family. He's pulled through but there's a long journey ahead for him and the outcome is uncertain at the mo. I just hope there's light at the end of the tunnel.
     However!! I am to become an auntie soon to twin boys...big gulp. It'll be the best birthday present for me ever, haha. Despite the rollercoaster we're all enduring, this is definitely a blessing, and I'm so pleased for my brother and sis-in-law. It'll be a busy few months ahead. New beginnings!



general life chit-chat I went away in July to South Cornwall which was stunning. I love the area anyway, but in the glorious sunshine it was so lovely. If you're a fan of the show Poldark, get yourself there. Charlestown is a must. Untouched and reeks of Aidan Turner ;-) haha. It was great to blow the cobwebs away and have gratitude for untouched beauty and the beauty in my own life, but reality does have a habit of stinging you back again! Last month, I've had to have my bloods taken several times, as I found out I suffer from B12 deficiency which has meant have a loading dose of 6 injections, so that's been fun (on 3 occasions, I became ill..) As my body cannot absorb the vitamin, I apparently had been living on empty essentially for a while. Stand by to hear of any cognitive, physiological & emotional improvements! Perhaps some of my "foggy head" symptoms will disappear.  

So, lovely ones, that's the extent of the last few months for me. As noted, the weather here was simply beautiful so my getaway to Cornwall was pretty much idyllic. Thus said, I'm going to force myself to embrace Autumn. (I rarely have to say that!) This year, it feels particularly difficult...I'm not where I thought I'd be, and with the big C word approaching, well, I'm not ready for this year to end!! But whilst it's still here, I hope to bask in the sumptuous colours of Fall, rejuvenate oneself in salt water baths, indulge in guilt-free gingerbread & mince pies and spend priceless time with family & friends..
     Who'll join me on this journey...? Take care :-)

Retrograde release & Spring is springing!

Soooo, how are we in March already ?! I recall blinking and now it is Easter next week...God knows when that happened.
       Now, it may not look or feel like it, but Spring is here, and if you look hard enough, Mother Nature is trying hard to show us some signs.

Our planetary alignments also work hard at doing just that. (spoiler: this will be a bit spiritual-y, but y'all know how my posts are..) Mercury has gone retrograde in Aries and the Spring Equinox has arrived. Have you been feeling ultra emotional? Hyper-sensitive? That'll be the pre-shadow period for you. So, for a week before Mercury stations you may feel like technology is failing you, delays happen, past feelings/people catch up with you; basically, we're consciously aware of hurts, needs, triggers. Some of us may feel that more. I do as I'm quite a watery sign, but my fire soon bites back.

How can we move forward into April with passion and action, but with purpose and in our best interests? For me, I'm a pretty logical person but in retrograde, I think my perfectionist side gets muddled and confused. I want to get the show on the road but also want to be sure on whether I am right in my decisions, so some Aries, impulsive energy may be good for me to give me some extra fire! Perhaps you too. Remember though, introspection is key here, being impulsive isn't always wise, especially now.

A lot of readers may think getting in touch with your spiritual side is nonsense, but for me, it's helps me become a tad more mindful & eases stress- so it may for you ? You know, we have so much armour on these days that we forget to nurture. Take this time to become more present. Consciously release any physical or mental stress that might be present in your body or mind. Be kind to you, shed the ego and social conditionings. Reinvigorating ourselves can help us to wire ourselves up differently ready for April.

Sometimes, we can chase dreams, achieve goals, compare our lives, that we forget to evaluate things.
This 3 week check-in can help us reanalyse our lives and understand if what we do in our lives is definitely what we want or if any changes can happen. We can refigure out what makes us happy, all around. The whole package of our dream identity might actually be missing a certain je ne sais quoi.. see if you find it again!
       So. Let your sails be set and the winds will blow. If we all have bravery to take charge, we can proceed as our true, selfless selves. What retrograde can do for you, if you wish to apply it, is direct you to a more advanced you- think outside of the box. The seed is ready to grow now, the cocoon of winter needs to be shed. {*note to self}

I guess what I'm trying to say here is, slow down, do some inner work and look at things in a new light. Take a day or two each week to wind down or concentrate on getting jobs you've put off doing (but don't make that taxing, I'm talking spring cleaning, blog work etc!)

My last few weeks have been a bit odd, for want of a better word. With winter vibes clinging on and a feeling of a universal somewhat melancholy, I wanted to grab this chance to perhaps reach out to someone who really needs a pep talk. Misfortune is always greater to someone else and even at our vulnerable states we can find strength

Take care and let me know your thoughts below! If you'd like to hear more of what I love, feel welcome to follow my Insta >>>

Let's just boss babe this year!

Hi everyone! And hi 2018...I feel kind of freaked out at how quickly the years are flying by if I'm honest. Are you ?

It has also got me to thinking/re-evaluating what is best for me in the route I'm taking in life. Every January I get rather nostalgic and whimsical thinking about goals and past achievements. (I spent last week feeling rotten with a cold so this week can count as my new beginning!)
       This said, this isn't a New Year, New me. No. I want us to continue...continue growing. Resolutions are not needed IMO as they often get broken, ie. I will cut out carbs. Not happening !!

What we can do is: Resolve to try something new. Resolve to be bold. Resolve to grow.
This is the perfect time to get a fresh perspective on your life in the new year and think about what went right in the previous year & work on that. My Instagram & blog have been important to me and it's recently given me insight into what to invest in more. Since reading my January '17 post, I can see some good changes but also some more goals I can focus on. A big dose of self-expansion is my aim and I would love for certain loves of mine to prosper; such as mental health, social work and brain tumour awareness..

I feel like I need to invest in my mind every day to really engage with my true self. I will be the first to admit that last year I still had a subconscious thread of self-doubt that reared its head occasionally. I've had a few years where I've had to work on that (with some huge backup from my mum whom I regard as my truest, best friend a girl can have!) Self-doubt causes so many crappy things to form..anger, unfair comparisons, fear, intrusive thoughts, low mood, procrastination.

So what have I learnt in 2017 and what should change? What wisdom can I spread to one and all!? (..sense my sarcasm please. I'm not the oracle) I will try though: - 

When I read posts from say, a couple of years ago, I can see how my writing style has evolved and blossomed. My posting is not consistent, I know, and I don't really know why but my life just gets in the way and I forget. Bizarre as I love writing; it's therapeutic. I used to keep diaries as a teen but then switched to a daily *to-do diary*. I don't want to look back at this post next year and to not have progressed, so by March I would like to publish my brain tumour story and perhaps begin a book as such - if the interest arises of course. 

I really enjoy the spiritual path I've been on & it's helped to understand myself more. However, I have lots I want to learn and as much as I like to learn through trial & error, I could do with some guidance and teaching so more books perhaps, witchy tools, affirmations or a Buddhist course. I want to heighten my energetic vibrations and align with the Universe.

No more excuses or procrastination. This really is my demon sometimes. I have a lot of thoughts that whirl around my head a lot of the time so I certainly need to re-centre myself and gain focus and energy from something very positive such as meditation or alternative therapies.  

I wish to pay attention to matters of wellness. I'm 30 years old now {blimey.} and my health is important- I also want to be in the best shape I can, for me. Be mindful of my diet and exercise self-discipline when it comes to naughty foods that disagree with IBS symptoms! When I do work out, I never regret it but my problem is staying on track for sure. 

Last year, I felt like a lot of misguided judgements were pointed at me. I'm fairly intuitive and definitely felt like every time I tried to date, for instance, a barrier was put in the way {not by me!} I don't know if that's down to the society we live in, or that men just don't get my fairly dark humour. I mean, come-on it's 2018, let's not be so serious yeh!? No-one likes a wet fish. It's not just that though, as a fiery person, I'm also empathetic so it's hard to shake things off. My mum has felt pretty burned by last year; she's what people call a very friendly, lovely, helpful person but that can have its burdens. I won't go further but this year needs to be about balance of character; learning to develop on positive characteristics, let things go but staying true to self ultimately. 

A positive mindset generally begins with self-care I think. Never feel guilty for nurturing yourself. When you take care of you, there’s more of you to go around other people. Make time to relax, whether that's enjoying a warm bath or getting outdoors. I'm making it my mission to take up new hobbies..I love to walk in Wales or the Lake District, so more of that please. But extend it further, tick off the travel list, join a dance club. What I'm saying is, do more of what you love this year. No excuses and no apologies. Claim what you desire!

So..girls (& guys), be the biggest #bossbabe you can this this 2018. Take your dreams, and pursue them by the balls...