Wednesday, 4 July 2018

The dating underbelly for the emotional snowballer

This may just be one of my most emotionally charged posts to date. It's late again, yes...I know, I know, but to be honest with you, where's this year flying off to!? I mean, it's July, excuse me? Sloowww down, life. Haha.

Ahem, tangents Lucy, tangents. Where was I...okay, so, by definition, I can be a bit of a chameleon by persona. I reckon we all are, to suit different occasions. Anyway, after a recent date I had back in May, I thought 'Oh, I may have a game changer here, we actually seem to suit each other!'.
      So anyway, we get to another date and I figured, I'm gonna wear my heart on my sleeve, show a lot more of the "real me", see where it gets me. Well boy could I be more wrong!! Soon after, he bolted. I determined that I was too much, put too much emotion into it. Or maybe my personality is crap HA. (No big up but it's not.) But here's the thing.. I'm 30 years of age. I entered back into the world of single, dating life at a time when society was getting a bit grim. We've got this era of Instagram, comparisons, too much choice, self-obsession..that people just think that there's always something better around the corner; they may be happy but think they can be happier, you know?    
     When will people learn that often, the grass isn't always greener?!

I've come to terms with being single, but when I date, it's actually then that I realise I dislike being 'alone'- for the record, I'm not alone, I have my family and friends but you catch my drift.. Dating is hard these days. You've got no idea what anyone truly wants and that surely must be because no-one is putting any emotion into it and that's so bloody annoying. As a person who know's what they want in a significant person, I don't mind making my feelings clear through action; I have no time to waste, people! When it's reciprocated, you figure you're both on the same page, but when they then disappear, you reallly start questioning not only yourself, but life too. {I am referring to the above fella yes, the pr*ck.}

























I'm sure that to many I probably don't appear that emotional & it's true, often I can hide those feelings or thoughts we bottle up from onlookers, but whilst I can appear clear-headed, in the last few years I have also done some soul-searching.. A lot has gone on that has made me self-analyse. Do you find that once you get to your late twenties, you're much more reflective? As much as I like to think that I don't take things personally, I can tend to, especially when I care about something [although, maybe sometimes I care about the idea of something more]. That's a passionate nature though, thus, I can criticise my own persona but at the end of the day, we are our own identity, right? No excuses.

Don't apologise for being a person who's not afraid to show others their feelings, whether that be through action or vocally. There's nothing wrong with being a sensitive soul, but it is important to learn how to control the feelings, so they don't overwhelm you...or potentially, others.
       Take the above dating fiasco. I let my guard down, maybe too soon. Who knows. I was honest, I liked him but who's to say the other person truly is. You take the cues from others but then they change their mind. Perhaps that is just their prerogative ? What I'm saying is, be careful with baring all, but don't feel bad for being true to yourself.

The world is an overstimulated place, and I honestly think that one thing that can ground you and place you in the present moment is making solid connections. For a while now, for me, it's been in the hope of finding a partner I guess. It gets me thinking that maybe a lot of people have an overpowering chatter in their mind or a barrage of emotions which makes them overanalyse dating and the technicalities or "correct etiquette" that it brings...

Expressing yourself has many cognitive, emotional and social benefits and can lead to a more connected, fulfilled life with others, however, when in the company of people who may have a hidden agenda (whether they appear to be on the same page as you or not), it would be best to exercise caution - Something I need to follow myself as clearly, people take more advantage than I originally thought! Take your time when getting to know them–don’t give them too much of yourself too fast

Are you a sensitive person; a sharer; a slave to your emotions ? Here are some tips that can help to control or counteract said emotions: -

Give yourself a break: Those who are empaths/emotional people yearn for the closeness of deep, personal relationships & intimacy but as you may know, that can make dating tricky. You're probably intuitive and likely to pick up on subtle clues that most people won’t see. You may delve into something quickly, letting your feelings run wild. We struggle to let things go and crave downtime. We feel deeply.. but you know what, if a person you're considering dating is making you feel anxious about any of this, don't let them. Uniqueness should be accepted!

Self care: Making space for spiritual connection is a huge part of daily routine for the empath. So much energy is used that you need to make room for silence... Whether that be through meditation, exercise, walking in nature etc. Continue being open and honest and talk about any struggles without hesitation or fear. If you're having a bad day, week or month, don't feel ashamed or guilty..tell someone, but also understand that often, giving yourself quiet time to recharge is key.

Breathe, recite and laugh: Life is a constant wax & wane of good and bad days. If, like me, you sometimes feel overwhelmed by the latter, we're not alone. Sensitive people feel the tidal waves of many emotion, thus, slowing down is really important when you feel triggered.
For ex. Focus on consciously exhaling out tension [take 5 mins every hour to close your eyes & take your mind to a happy, calm space].
I'd also suggest tons of self-compassion. I bet you're an excellent chameleon but I also bet you're also self critical? Mantras are great to keep a daily focus of desire in mind: simply reciting "this too shall pass| I am worthy & strong| if I accomplish one thing, that is still progress." is helpful.
I also find that listening to happy music is one of the best cures to stop emotional snowballing. My go-to is usually some Deep house Ibiza mixes. They lift my mood instantly. Another is watching comedic films, or films that make me ponder: It's good to have a list of some so you can watch straight away. I watched It's Kind of a Funny Story the other week when I felt negative; definitely recommend.




Any other singletons go through this emotional pressure cooker? Or does anyone in general feel your emotional nature is beneficial or negative to your mental health ? Share your tips!

Sunday, 25 March 2018

Retrograde release & Spring is springing!

Soooo, how are we in March already ?! I recall blinking and now it is Easter next week...God knows when that happened.
       Now, it may not look or feel like it, but Spring is here, and if you look hard enough, Mother Nature is trying hard to show us some signs.


Our planetary alignments also work hard at doing just that. (spoiler: this will be a bit spiritual-y, but y'all know how my posts are..) Mercury has gone retrograde in Aries and the Spring Equinox has arrived. Have you been feeling ultra emotional? Hyper-sensitive? That'll be the pre-shadow period for you. So, for a week before Mercury stations you may feel like technology is failing you, delays happen, past feelings/people catch up with you; basically, we're consciously aware of hurts, needs, triggers. Some of us may feel that more. I do as I'm quite a watery sign, but my fire soon bites back.

How can we move forward into April with passion and action, but with purpose and in our best interests? For me, I'm a pretty logical person but in retrograde, I think my perfectionist side gets muddled and confused. I want to get the show on the road but also want to be sure on whether I am right in my decisions, so some Aries, impulsive energy may be good for me to give me some extra fire! Perhaps you too. Remember though, introspection is key here, being impulsive isn't always wise, especially now.

A lot of readers may think getting in touch with your spiritual side is nonsense, but for me, it's helps me become a tad more mindful & eases stress- so it may for you ? You know, we have so much armour on these days that we forget to nurture. Take this time to become more present. Consciously release any physical or mental stress that might be present in your body or mind. Be kind to you, shed the ego and social conditionings. Reinvigorating ourselves can help us to wire ourselves up differently ready for April.

Sometimes, we can chase dreams, achieve goals, compare our lives, that we forget to evaluate things.
This 3 week check-in can help us reanalyse our lives and understand if what we do in our lives is definitely what we want or if any changes can happen. We can refigure out what makes us happy, all around. The whole package of our dream identity might actually be missing a certain je ne sais quoi.. see if you find it again!
       So. Let your sails be set and the winds will blow. If we all have bravery to take charge, we can proceed as our true, selfless selves. What retrograde can do for you, if you wish to apply it, is direct you to a more advanced you- think outside of the box. The seed is ready to grow now, the cocoon of winter needs to be shed. {*note to self}

I guess what I'm trying to say here is, slow down, do some inner work and look at things in a new light. Take a day or two each week to wind down or concentrate on getting jobs you've put off doing (but don't make that taxing, I'm talking spring cleaning, blog work etc!)

My last few weeks have been a bit odd, for want of a better word. With winter vibes clinging on and a feeling of a universal somewhat melancholy, I wanted to grab this chance to perhaps reach out to someone who really needs a pep talk. Misfortune is always greater to someone else and even at our vulnerable states we can find strength

Take care and let me know your thoughts below! If you'd like to hear more of what I love, feel welcome to follow my Insta >>>

Tuesday, 9 January 2018

Let's just boss babe this year!

Hi everyone! And hi 2018...I feel kind of freaked out at how quickly the years are flying by if I'm honest. Are you ?

It has also got me to thinking/re-evaluating what is best for me in the route I'm taking in life. Every January I get rather nostalgic and whimsical thinking about goals and past achievements. (I spent last week feeling rotten with a cold so this week can count as my new beginning!)
       This said, this isn't a New Year, New me. No. I want us to continue...continue growing. Resolutions are not needed IMO as they often get broken, ie. I will cut out carbs. Not happening !!

What we can do is: Resolve to try something new. Resolve to be bold. Resolve to grow.
This is the perfect time to get a fresh perspective on your life in the new year and think about what went right in the previous year & work on that. My Instagram & blog have been important to me and it's recently given me insight into what to invest in more. Since reading my January '17 post, I can see some good changes but also some more goals I can focus on. A big dose of self-expansion is my aim and I would love for certain loves of mine to prosper; such as mental health, social work and brain tumour awareness..

I feel like I need to invest in my mind every day to really engage with my true self. I will be the first to admit that last year I still had a subconscious thread of self-doubt that reared its head occasionally. I've had a few years where I've had to work on that (with some huge backup from my mum whom I regard as my truest, best friend a girl can have!) Self-doubt causes so many crappy things to form..anger, unfair comparisons, fear, intrusive thoughts, low mood, procrastination.


So what have I learnt in 2017 and what should change? What wisdom can I spread to one and all!? (..sense my sarcasm please. I'm not the oracle) I will try though: - 

When I read posts from say, a couple of years ago, I can see how my writing style has evolved and blossomed. My posting is not consistent, I know, and I don't really know why but my life just gets in the way and I forget. Bizarre as I love writing; it's therapeutic. I used to keep diaries as a teen but then switched to a daily *to-do diary*. I don't want to look back at this post next year and to not have progressed, so by March I would like to publish my brain tumour story and perhaps begin a book as such - if the interest arises of course. 

I really enjoy the spiritual path I've been on & it's helped to understand myself more. However, I have lots I want to learn and as much as I like to learn through trial & error, I could do with some guidance and teaching so more books perhaps, witchy tools, affirmations or a Buddhist course. I want to heighten my energetic vibrations and align with the Universe.

No more excuses or procrastination. This really is my demon sometimes. I have a lot of thoughts that whirl around my head a lot of the time so I certainly need to re-centre myself and gain focus and energy from something very positive such as meditation or alternative therapies.  

I wish to pay attention to matters of wellness. I'm 30 years old now {blimey.} and my health is important- I also want to be in the best shape I can, for me. Be mindful of my diet and exercise self-discipline when it comes to naughty foods that disagree with IBS symptoms! When I do work out, I never regret it but my problem is staying on track for sure. 

Last year, I felt like a lot of misguided judgements were pointed at me. I'm fairly intuitive and definitely felt like every time I tried to date, for instance, a barrier was put in the way {not by me!} I don't know if that's down to the society we live in, or that men just don't get my fairly dark humour. I mean, come-on it's 2018, let's not be so serious yeh!? No-one likes a wet fish. It's not just that though, as a fiery person, I'm also empathetic so it's hard to shake things off. My mum has felt pretty burned by last year; she's what people call a very friendly, lovely, helpful person but that can have its burdens. I won't go further but this year needs to be about balance of character; learning to develop on positive characteristics, let things go but staying true to self ultimately. 

A positive mindset generally begins with self-care I think. Never feel guilty for nurturing yourself. When you take care of you, there’s more of you to go around other people. Make time to relax, whether that's enjoying a warm bath or getting outdoors. I'm making it my mission to take up new hobbies..I love to walk in Wales or the Lake District, so more of that please. But extend it further, tick off the travel list, join a dance club. What I'm saying is, do more of what you love this year. No excuses and no apologies. Claim what you desire!


So..girls (& guys), be the biggest #bossbabe you can this this 2018. Take your dreams, and pursue them by the balls...

Wednesday, 15 November 2017

Recharging those batteries



Do you know that feeling where things seem to be going well, and then for some reason things take a bit of a dive downhill ?! This is me for a couple of weeks now on and off - and I've been putting off this post for like, a month. Terrible right? As if my lack of postage wasn't poor enough HA. If I was doing this as a full time job, I'd give it everything but I've not felt like that..not ideal.

Now, I don't like to be a fraud, and I hope that if you are a reader, you can sense my honesty so anyway, I've been reading back through my posts from this time last year & I'm sensing a pattern emerging; I could call it a rut but I shan't. It's more like that lady Universe is just testing testing.
       Nothing is awful, but my father has been poorly again, and me personally, I'm just not taking my own advice, and I do feel kind've shit about that. We should practice what we preach! It's my birthday at the end of Nov- the BIG 3.0! and I planned to write a post just before that so I need to get my act together.

I don't know about you guys, but I always find that November has become 'pre Christmas' month. Like it may as well not exist. Well I dislike that; it's the depths of Autumn and should be embraced! Talking about Christmas, our society is so go-go-go all the time.. Always on countdown to something. Does it make you want to restart or recharge? It sure does me!! Autumn brings us an understanding of our own personal changes within the seasons that are life and that's pretty magical.

This weekend, I plan to recharge my batteries, hopefully within a day! I have a pre-birthday theatre event on Sunday, but I definitely feel the need to reflect and rejuvenate. Spiritualists say that everything we need is within us. That's probably true but you definitely need inner peace to find it. To address stagnation and manifest, you have to nurture a passion and bring it to life; especially if you're feeling somewhat unsatisfied- Self exploration helps! I find that this time of year can make many feel drenched in stress, despair or 'winter blues' but a refresh can significantly improve your mood.

Putting yourself in The Hermit position can aid introspection. In the Tarot spread, Hermit can signify loneliness, hibernation, truth seeker, guidance. Using it as a positive resource means solitude, gaining wisdom, enlightenment, fearlessness. For ex: we recharge our phones but rarely ourselves..
       So lets take some contemplative action: -

1. Unplug from tech. A day off from e-mails, media and endless scrolling means you can actually read that book that's been sitting on the shelf for months. This'll helps us feel more mindful and aware of our surroundings. Being present leads to a sense of control and empowerment.

2. Walking. Possibly the simplest and most cost-free solution to relaxation. Taking in fresh air and our surrounding completely enhances serotonin levels. Embrace quietness in the woods. Mind and body work in tandem so perhaps take on a home workout; yoga or cardio, whatever you fancy!

3. Heavy energies can induce some challenges and mood shifts; guided meditation involving water can ease and purify heaviness. Take a long soak in the bath with aromatherapy oils, soothing music, a hair/skin mask- your bathroom is your spa.

4. Give yourself a DIY mani/pedi (for the boys too!). I do this a lot. Buy yourself a new colour. Winter= berry season and treat yourself like a queen. Use some coconut oil and bathe your tired hands & feet! Pampering works wonders, and you look pretty too.

5. Feeling burnt out will essentially mean you cannot help others as you're neglecting yourself. Go within yourself and nourish your inner thoughts. Journalling for an hour can energise you into thinking about future ideas, memories or plans. A sense of order can be liberating & afterwards you can watch a movie whilst snuggled up in bed!

6. Bake or cook. I love baking. Whether it be mouthwatering cakes or pies. There's something so satisfying about cooking a new recipe, and it's very mindful. So many positives- and it'll make your house smell divine.



Now we have spent some time healing ourselves, the mysticism of the season should be enough now to replenish and balance our souls. Until next time.. <3

Thursday, 10 August 2017

All that glitters is not gold?

Dear August, You used to be so hot when I was a youngster. Now, you're a burnt out soul…

It's raining here in England. It's dull and I feel miserable and procrastination has set in. I feel unproductive. Sometimes, you need to surrender to your physical feelings and slow the hell down. 

I can feel this cosmic tug that's trying to drag me under, and that, I won't allow. I've learned now that my body will let me know when I need to "just be" but I also have some quite life-altering things coming up very soon so my Positive, proactive, speedy hat needs to be firmly on. 
          This sounds so negative I know but it's simply honesty. I don't enjoy fakeness. What I'm saying is, say yes and give way to the energy you're feeling. That fire in your little belly yearns for some reflection. Recharge those batteries in a day & see what's on your mind: - 

- Is it a vacation you need ?
- A new career plan ?
- A pet ?
- A tech detox ?
- An afternoon of spontaneous adventure ?
- A date ?
- A new outfit ?

These quick fire thoughts are the things you truly crave and will bring new joy or possibility to your life. A lot of the time, they are the simple things...like indulging in a hot, bubble bath with a glass of wine; sweet, relaxing sounds and scents surrounding you.
     Think of it like story writing, write down little gems of wisdom. This is your bit of glitter, be it however small. Life is about seeing beauty in the little things around us and sometimes, overwhelming, differing thoughts can leave you reviewing your whole life, but take a day to forget about the practicalities of how to figure out those loud thoughts- focus on something small…All that glitters is not gold.



A lot of problems occur these days due to comparison, and because I've had a few days of feeling like I'm stagnant {check out my Insta for more chat on this!} or my life's just trucking along, it got me to thinking how quickly you can lose your logical sense. Perfection really does not exist, everything is trial & error. Society has become obsessed with attaining the impossible ideal at all levels and the trouble is, some people get sucked into the realm but in fact, the glitzy, perfect perceptions people have are often not that precious at all or indicative of ones' true nature! Authenticity looks like it's gone out of the window with carefully orchestrated individual's walking around instead, thus leaving the minority of real people who recognise that 'All that glitters is not gold', feeling their own anxieties even more intensely which is ridiculous because knowing ones' flaws & strengths is the key to higher potential! A great phrase I heard is "So many selflies, so little knowledge of self."
     So please know, the muddy water will disperse when you just sit still for a while and be true to yourself. Recognise all the sentimental feels but know that the logic will return in due course!

Key pointers
Know thyself. Decipher what's held you back from your opportunities.. Mindful introspection on the past & present you can help your gain clarity on your divine life purpose
Stay humble and know that success happens in its own time.. Don't distract yourself with conventional thinking; ground yourself back with the spiritual realm, breathe out the perfectionist ideals and be true to you!
Don't put value on things that is not true beauty; those that put too much emphasis on narcissism or materialism reflects fool's gold-- It's not real!!!


Here's to a productive, feisty month, hopefully full of our own bit of sparkle, happiness and fulfilment! 

Tuesday, 27 June 2017

Hands up masochists!!


Emotional Masochism.

Now there's a opening statement for you! I was having a read through my blog and how I wish to enhance it to its full potential {because it really needs it!} Anyway, I was thinking to myself, "What would my readers like to read; articles about beauty, fashion, adventures...which I do love. Or real life? Some insights into my soul, my personal issues or just my everyday life"-- And from this, I discovered that my readers get the most satisfaction from reading about how I get through life with the added pressures that may come about, due to internal struggles that have occurred from time to time.
       So I'm sticking with that! If you feel differently or think of anything I could improve upon, let me know..I'm just a message away guys!

In my last post [sorry, how long ago Luce?] we were in the depths of Spring, well now we have here our Summer Solstice, yay :-) Offering us some flighty, warm feels, hope and fiery energy. Yes? Well not for everyone. I'm doing well but not everyone has those sunny, light emotions and it can be an isolating, confusing time for some. We have also endured, as a Universe, some horrific Terror attacks, natural disasters and fires. The list is endless and devastating, but this in itself can make may a person quite fearful.

For those who suffer from an invisible/mental illness, just because there is a lightness or warmth in the air, it doesn't mean that their troubles just disappear, and unfortunately not everyone has the skill of empathy to understand that fact. For some people, getting out of bed in the morning is a huge task; they may torment themselves for not being happy*, be on the verge of tears.   *never feel bad about that
       For example, we're half way through the year which can flood us with some tricky astro alignments that can cause the worry about your next steps in life's next cycle. Do you ever feel like this? It can seem like one step forward & two back, and in the past six months I've definitely had feelings of…'what have I learned, am I fitter, why haven't I dated, have I saved enough ££' This kind of masochism makes you feel as though you're on a rollercoaster 100% of the time. Perhaps flip those thoughts and consider the rollercoaster as a practice run: Life is a journey!
       There can be pressure during the longer, brighter days to not emotionally hibernate or get stuck in a loop. This surely is tough going if your 'get up & go' has flown. I say it alll the time, but as it is summer, get yourself out in nature, exercise, listen to birdsong, bring colourful, aromatic flowers indoors. Trust that it'll improve your wellbeing, even if it's just a smidge.

Carrie Bradshaw proclaims "I must be some sort of masochist or something" - SATC.

Why do we do this. Go round in circles. We know it's bad, we know it's insane but still, there's a lingering self-flagellation going on…the subconsious want of experiencing pain and ache, even though it does you no good. La Douleur Exquise. It's a pretty sadomasochism point of view but it's true. It's pain that becomes more intense, psychosomatic. A flood of worry and uncertainty can consume a person so quickly, even when life has been improving. Enough-Don't do it-Don't destroy the good elixir! Find that helpful resource and focus on that; be it a friend, parent, an animal or therapist. I recently heard that the most evolved people are the most broken. Who knows if that is true, but that colourful past you have, embrace it. Emotionally torturing oneself over & over will only lead to heartache. Think of law of attraction, you've done the work so the world will do the rest- we need to learn to let things shift for the better by themselves...

















































If you can take any tips from me, which I hope someone can, remember that the year is not over. Life is not over for you. Perhaps an open heart can lead to an open mind & anything can happen. Good, bad, sometimes we never know but 2017 in particular is all about new beginnings and manifestation. Use that to your advantage; live those days, don't question why you're doing so well and then revert back to type in a state of emotional chaos. Is it worth it? 

Monday, 24 April 2017

Life Thus Far: an overview

Oh my oh my, sweet friends. I am SO delayed!! If there was an award for procrastination that would definitely go to me; the master {not that I condone procrastinating!}… I have also realised that I haven't posted a LTF series in an exceedingly long time so, without further ado…

The weather here in Britain has been particularly unpredictable which is kind've wreaking havoc with my moods (and head; my shunt reacts to weather!), so I've not felt I've had the chance to really sit and write up about what's been going on lately, so I'm sitting here with my incense on whilst my cat pesters me for attention; it's as best a time as any eh!! 
       Do you ever sense a surge of overwhelment coming your way, like me?? I tell you, I was all guns blazing in January; I really wanted to kick start 2017 with a bang and "let that sh*t go" but by February, things starting going haywire again. Not in a bad way but things starting going wrong. I don't know if it's the fact that I've become a tad more in tune with spirituality or if it's just life being a bitch, ha….Anyway, today I'm focused on the affirmation found in Katie Piper's book Start Your Day With Katie: 365 Affirmations for a Year of Positive Thinking which I've used religiously: - 


'Seek harmony in your soul and kindness in the people close to you; happiness found in material things will not bring you lasting joy.'


I think that is such a comforting statement! When I think of this, what I consider is that I've definitely spent the last few months clearing out what doesn't serve me. I mean, as you may have read, my persona can flip a lot and as much as I can feel overwhelming, there's also so much oomph within me. My father, as I noted in my last post, had been poorly on&off since November; he's been feeling better for a couple of months so that's lifted some heavy clouds that were lingering!!
With a tendency to over-think and rethink, I decided to take advantage of the Spring Equinox & re-align and balance those scales, so to speak…it can be easy for some of us to jump from decision to decision and feel like you're 'all over the place', but that's where Spring can help to ease us into a sense of harmony, renewal & reassess some priorities. 
        So I took the opportunity to look for some volunteer work, on the side. I started some training in Feb/March at a homeless emergency nightshelter so yep, loving my shifts there. I've done plenty of volunteering in my time but working with the homeless is something I've wanted to pursue for a long time! I still feel like my journey is ongoing; my dreams are still there to attain but I'm always off on a tangent! However, you have to trust that the universe will offer you great changes in divine timing :)



The purpose you aspire to is always there so I continue going forward, and if it helps anyone, my advice is to get out in nature if you need help in cleansing and expanding your soul. Nature is breathtaking with its untouched beauty and there really is something so purifying about being around it (even if you bring it indoors- note my precious cactus above). A New Moon is coming up this Wednesday that's heading into the sign of Taurus so that calls for bullish energy that'll keep us grounded and fuel newfound wisdom, so take hold of reliable and earthly feels!


Stowe, National Trust, Buckingham

I adore this capture I snapped; it's as if the heavens are breaking through with our angels. Enchanted. So, lovely folks, I'll leave you with that. I intend to carry on keeping my dreams in sight, continue learning & doing new things and steer clear of negative emotional entanglements - has the year started off how you intended? Or perhaps your desires or intentions have changed? Let me know, I'd love to hear and trade stories…

…and ps. our moon cycles can offer us so much subconscious information, so listen to your intuition always, and if you're a deep thinker who follows the watery fluidity of your many thoughts, just think, you're probably a mermaid ;-) Take care guys!