2020+1 Self-care

Hello, fellow humans! Happy new 2020+1 haha. (Yes, cause basically I think 2020 was a sneak preview..) What do you guys think ? Should I be more optimistic or am I on the money?! I'm a realist, what can I say...

Really though, Happy NY! I honestly hope that 2021 brings with it happiness, success and good health. I think it's needed, huh. On a global scale. We've had chaos, disaster, restrictions & I have no doubt that many of us feel stressed, confused or in need of a pick me up. For those who have suffered loss, I understand the tragedy of this, and I hope time helps to heal somewhat. 

       Perhaps you enjoyed the compact Christmas or was the lack of festive cheer something you missed. Lets face it, it's felt different for sure. Personally, it's been the 'build up' that I missed, no Christmas markets or carol singing with mulled wine at one of my favourite pubs. I've never been OTT with spending and so on, so that was normal (although, high streets are failing currently. V. sad) Tree and house decorated; again, normal traditions. London usually has their annual fireworks display but alas, it was cancelled. For any reader of mine, NYE is nothing too fancy for me: See New years day banter I do however like New Year's Day- which is what I will focus on here for you!

So now the gloom is out the way. Ha. (sorry, my water energy likes to kick in!) You may already be jumping to conclusions, myself included but lets put aside uncertainty and look back at what has gone right for you- What achievements have had, no matter how large or small? 

Before you let this new year fog up your vision, give your emotional state some extra care & attention. January has always been a tad blue-sy, with its dark mornings etc, so lets see if we can celebrate with gusto eh! 2021 is all about Aquarian energy..Divination, authenticity, creation, philanthropy. All we need to focus on this year is being great versions of ourselves; do that self-care so to strengthen wellbeing, relationships/work. I'm talking: -

Trust intuition, your gut- sometimes it knows best

See beyond the narratives, push through the circus of life! 

Embrace fresh air& the beauty of natures- it revitalises energy

Prioritise self and set boundaries with those around. Ex. If you want to read a chapter of a book on a Sunday morning, make it your target! & perhaps stay offline then too..

For instance, my brother and I both got new jobs last year. Mine has been particularly difficult as due to the nature of lockdowns etc, a lot of colleagues were/are working from home, leaving me feeling like a lost lamb quite often! But I've persevered, seen it as a challenge and opportunity to train, learn on my own and think hard about what I want for this year, aside from continue with this new role: -

• Aim to purchase a house or apartment
• Continue to decrease eating meat- and dairy, as neither help my gut tolerance. Love me some cheese though.
• Never settle for a man that I don't feel is worth my energy, no matter how potent the addiction!
• Travel as much as I can (time, money permitting)
• Be around like-minded people as much as poss.

These are not resolutions and I hope to expand on these but this past year has taught me that I need to find people I truly vibe with. This year I zoned in on intuition and what my core morals are, what I wish to fight for in life & who with- It's been thoroughly interesting.

What is your soul now desiring, maybe it is now different to what you originally thought? Hold those dreams close and aim to get them- Don't let a pandemic get in your way, please! 

I wanted this to be short and sweet. I’m spending the day spring cleaning so here above are my NY cupcakes. Until next time, I honestly wish a calm, courageous and fun year to you all :-) 

My 2020 New Year musings

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYBODY!

Happy 2020. I hope that you've enjoyed the festivities and that the new year gives you everything you desire. I cannot believe another decade has zoomed by. I feel good about the '20s I think. She says. I felt bloated & sluggish on NYD so I exercised and went for a winter walk. Then it was back to work, reality. I have shed loads of things to attain and achieve and this did give me some panic- but with some great pep talks from my family and friends over the Christmas period, I am determined to get what I desire.

I wanted to get rid of a horrid situation (so many things about it angered me, that I thought I'd share it with you!) But nahh, I'm not going to air too much dirty laundry; this is not Dear Diary haha. It's unfair so I'll remove most of the narrative but the gist is >>
      So, if you look back on my previous post, I had been dating someone for a while: Decent, interesting person I thought; a few red flags I chose to ignore because I felt an emotional connection that seemed compelling. Meh. Well, it doesn't take a genius to work out that someone is cheating- But apparently guys, he wasn't, because we'd ended [I, however wasn't aware of the fact.] Not to worry though, as no hurt was intended (!) Yada yada. Whilst they were going through some struggles, whilst I was constantly trying to check up on how he was...I got told "I need space" They saw fit to give someone else the opportunity to support & care for them. Wow, huh.
      You know when you look back and know exactly where you went wrong yourself, apologised & would have happily talked it over, but cannot fathom why the other person could never understand your point of view? That is disappointing stuff right there! head over to my Insta to see a more insightful post. With this said, my door is always kindly open to unfinished business. 

The aggravating thing is that I think when you put two opposite people together, there are many differences to work through of course, but in my opinion, the intimacy is off the scale.. And maybe, I value that a whole lot more than other people.
Destruction follows, chaos follows. We all make mistakes; no-one's perfect, but I know that whatever move I make, I take accountability of it. Own up. I do at least like people to understand my logic! You have to accept that the energies are for your highest good. Toxic energy leaves for a reason- and I'm not talking about just relationships.

Thing is, when these things happen, I instantly think, oh it's my fault. What's wrong with me, I'm the denominator. What has someone else got that I haven't. My thoughts become obsessive and negative. NO LUCY NO
This was not good. Horrendous whilst I was keeping up appearances at work etc. Then my birthday came in Nov and I thought, screw it, if someone who I cared about could go behind my back like that, I deserve a respectful man; not someone who made me doubt myself. Someone who appreciates you, wants to understand you and your idiocracies. We need solid don't we, no silly games. 2020 is a time you gain that, even if that means being your own soulmate.

The power is our own. Our choices are our own. I put lots of things in motion last year yet it still didn't feel right. I need to trust my own choices and instincts more, but also take risks this year. I know that I can easily hold back on things that I particularly want but it equally scares me. So I sabotage it - or do I? I certainly don't deserve to be discarded. I have an appreciation of people with mental health issues. I work in MH. I always wish to support, but I won't tolerate anyone adding to my own stresses unless they take responsibility for their own actions. You reap what you sow. Hi Karma!

Your external world is a reflection of your internal world. Soo I'm taking inspiration from a previous post of mine: Boss babe Spiritually, 2020 will be a big, powerful year of change and reward. I'm hoping for physical manifestation. If you see the number 4 flying around, take that as a very positive sign from the Universe :-) 4 is power, foundation, elemental. I want to take heed of my above post and embrace self care & wellness. Consider healthy new habits and routines to get into better shape: reading more often, go for long walks, take up that hobby that should have happened in 2019...

So what will be on your Self Care List? Maybe try writing a small goal could be set for relationships, career, interests, physical/mental health, personal growth. Whatcha reckon, fancy joining me on a quest to let go of habits that hold you back, cope with stressful situations with more ease, plan fun things to do in advance, find a beautiful love, heal from grief ?? 

 

Let's just boss babe this year!

Hi everyone! And hi 2018...I feel kind of freaked out at how quickly the years are flying by if I'm honest. Are you ?

It has also got me to thinking/re-evaluating what is best for me in the route I'm taking in life. Every January I get rather nostalgic and whimsical thinking about goals and past achievements. (I spent last week feeling rotten with a cold so this week can count as my new beginning!)
       This said, this isn't a New Year, New me. No. I want us to continue...continue growing. Resolutions are not needed IMO as they often get broken, ie. I will cut out carbs. Not happening !!

What we can do is: Resolve to try something new. Resolve to be bold. Resolve to grow.
This is the perfect time to get a fresh perspective on your life in the new year and think about what went right in the previous year & work on that. My Instagram & blog have been important to me and it's recently given me insight into what to invest in more. Since reading my January '17 post, I can see some good changes but also some more goals I can focus on. A big dose of self-expansion is my aim and I would love for certain loves of mine to prosper; such as mental health, social work and brain tumour awareness..

I feel like I need to invest in my mind every day to really engage with my true self. I will be the first to admit that last year I still had a subconscious thread of self-doubt that reared its head occasionally. I've had a few years where I've had to work on that (with some huge backup from my mum whom I regard as my truest, best friend a girl can have!) Self-doubt causes so many crappy things to form..anger, unfair comparisons, fear, intrusive thoughts, low mood, procrastination.

So what have I learnt in 2017 and what should change? What wisdom can I spread to one and all!? (..sense my sarcasm please. I'm not the oracle) I will try though: - 

When I read posts from say, a couple of years ago, I can see how my writing style has evolved and blossomed. My posting is not consistent, I know, and I don't really know why but my life just gets in the way and I forget. Bizarre as I love writing; it's therapeutic. I used to keep diaries as a teen but then switched to a daily *to-do diary*. I don't want to look back at this post next year and to not have progressed, so by March I would like to publish my brain tumour story and perhaps begin a book as such - if the interest arises of course. 

I really enjoy the spiritual path I've been on & it's helped to understand myself more. However, I have lots I want to learn and as much as I like to learn through trial & error, I could do with some guidance and teaching so more books perhaps, witchy tools, affirmations or a Buddhist course. I want to heighten my energetic vibrations and align with the Universe.

No more excuses or procrastination. This really is my demon sometimes. I have a lot of thoughts that whirl around my head a lot of the time so I certainly need to re-centre myself and gain focus and energy from something very positive such as meditation or alternative therapies.  

I wish to pay attention to matters of wellness. I'm 30 years old now {blimey.} and my health is important- I also want to be in the best shape I can, for me. Be mindful of my diet and exercise self-discipline when it comes to naughty foods that disagree with IBS symptoms! When I do work out, I never regret it but my problem is staying on track for sure. 

Last year, I felt like a lot of misguided judgements were pointed at me. I'm fairly intuitive and definitely felt like every time I tried to date, for instance, a barrier was put in the way {not by me!} I don't know if that's down to the society we live in, or that men just don't get my fairly dark humour. I mean, come-on it's 2018, let's not be so serious yeh!? No-one likes a wet fish. It's not just that though, as a fiery person, I'm also empathetic so it's hard to shake things off. My mum has felt pretty burned by last year; she's what people call a very friendly, lovely, helpful person but that can have its burdens. I won't go further but this year needs to be about balance of character; learning to develop on positive characteristics, let things go but staying true to self ultimately. 

A positive mindset generally begins with self-care I think. Never feel guilty for nurturing yourself. When you take care of you, there’s more of you to go around other people. Make time to relax, whether that's enjoying a warm bath or getting outdoors. I'm making it my mission to take up new hobbies..I love to walk in Wales or the Lake District, so more of that please. But extend it further, tick off the travel list, join a dance club. What I'm saying is, do more of what you love this year. No excuses and no apologies. Claim what you desire!

So..girls (& guys), be the biggest #bossbabe you can this this 2018. Take your dreams, and pursue them by the balls...

New Year's Day Banter!

So folks… It's New Year's Day. My love to you all! 

That snuck up quickly on us eh guys!? These last few of months have been, lets say, emotional. As I sit here with my glass of Shiraz and a good ole mince pie, I'm wondering how to word this post. I could sit here like every other human and discuss all of those gleeful resolutions that go in through one year and out the other, or I could boast about what wonderful things have happened.
       I could do that, my life is never without its positives or fun times, as is documented in previous posts, but I wish to get to the nitty gritty. I'm not a person who seeks for attention or sugar coats my life with fanciful, idealistic sentiments; that quite honestly, is not often true but the festive season craves it. I just want to lay bear the truth. Honesty is all I seek (although, I fear I sound cynical!) so here we go.
     
This NY I wish to celebrate every single person who suffers with any kind of hardship; and most importantly the big C. Cancer. I have endured my own illness and all the joys (haha..) that it brought about, but I could handle that because it was my own suffering. However, I've found it so much more overwhelming lately to see my father be so poorly and rundown due to his maintenance treatment; that has caused significant side effects {for bladder CIS cancer}. Thus, Christmas and New Year has felt, for want of a better word, difficult! It's been bloody hard to feel a) festive and b) joyous. I managed and we coped and all in all, it was lovely to be amongst family and friends. Optimism was on my side :-)

People forget so easily the many hardships that people can endure and especially at seasonal holidays. In just a blink of an eye, people can feel a sense of expectation to provide anecdotes of their achievements, right!? Well-intentioned but often heightened cheer and well-wishes, that all too often seem to disappear when January is in full swing. I'm all for celebration and love Christmas but it can prove tricky when you think of the millions of people who are suffering…just like my dad.
       This new year does however provide a chance to get rid of that; cancel toxicity, clear greed/vanity & delete comparisons. As I've noted, so many people are going through some real difficulty at present and this has really anchored deep into my soul recently. All I can offer is the opportunity forthwith to create new memories and moments. In illness for example, battle on and have strength. Have faith in you. I do. You can do it!

Lets face it, 2016 has had many issues on a personal & global scale. What with the mass of celebrity deaths and the terrors of war and terrorism, 2017 can only leave you with one feeling: Hope. Sweet friends, today marks the beginning of a brand new chapter. If you are reading this and perhaps going through some difficulties, know that all it takes is to put one step in front of the other. You see, goals are something that can be set or re-set all throughout the year. So take time in January to map out your hopes and desires. Understand why you want to achieve them and maybe share them with others so you get the accountability you need to not give up. It's an invitation to become present and mindful. That infinite potential that you see before you doesn't need to weigh heavy. Forget about everybody else and give your life a chance. Dig deep to find your determination and focus on that well-being!

So for me it's very simple. It's goodbye and good riddance to 2016. It's been a tumultuous year for our world as a whole & particularly for my family. So I wish us all health, happiness and success; but please bear this quote in mind and lets smash 2017!

Does this resonate or help?? I'd love to hear your Christmas & NY stories- good or bad! 

Take care guys. Love & light <3

The New Year Special.

Happy New Year to one and All!

It may be 'back to reality time' and yes, it hits us with a thud; but I do hope that everybody has had a smashing Christmas and NYE. I'm not big on NYE I have to say..never have been, but I had always tend to have a great time with family or friends. This year has been no different :-)

Now, if you follow my blog at all, you'll know that a) I've been really trying [she says trepidatiously] to maximise my blog postings more but I hope to become more frequent! and b) 2015 hasn't been one of my greatest of years due to lets call it, a breakdown, basically. No shame in it.

How I've carried on with any normality and fun in my life is beyond me…but I suppose that is where your support network and inner strength comes in & I have that in abundance. 

        BIG shout out to the mother dearest, as she really is a constant support. We have had massive arguments and disagreements, but she's always there. Can't thank her enough.

From working within mental health...and suffering myself with issues {HA}, I know how crucial it is to have lots of support around you, but also understanding that not everyone has this due to the heinous lack of mental health services, lack of a social/family network and the poor knowledge that bystanders can have of MH. This in itself is such a vicious cycle.

If you struggle with MH issues, you will totally get where I'm coming from and I really hope some of my posts have helped people understand. My brother said an insightful thing the other day- He knows that I've now been diagnosed with GAD- anxiety in lamest terms. He likened my dilemma to the fact that "She can't help her emotions taking over; it's just that in this moment she can't work out how to help herself reach her goals again" - I'm sure many people can relate to that. 

It is difficult for people to understand, I appreciate that but I do wish some could try to. Don't you? 

The way I see it is I know what I want from life & I know how to get it, but over the past year, it became misty. Like a barrier of fog, in which I hit and then can't get through, you know? It seems to be lifting though, thank god.   

I realised a lot of things over Christmas. I've begun to feel much more positive over the last few months; more like myself. The woman I remember from 2014 :-D

None of us can help hitting brick walls and falling prey to the pressure, but where does that get you? Miserable. That's it. Life changes, people change and lets face it, humans aren't fantastic with change. Especially when you've put up with so much of it!!!

So, Instagram has offered this #2015bestnine. Here's mine: 

I'm not a New Year's resolution kinda girl but usually I tend to resolve to be more physically fit & eat more healthily. Blah blah! External pressures in society can make living life extremely difficult, but it's our outlook which changes that. Looking at the geographic of my most "liked" photos on Insta, fitness is certainly something I need to improve upon; more MH inspiration along with relationship chat. 

Remember, it's only you who can have the self-confidence and determination to change things for the better. You can only achieve things if you rely on the experience you've gained from the past to make sure you experience nothing but success today. Easily done! Here's to 2016 lovely ones!